Tag Archives: 30 Day Writing Challenge

I Climb a Tree

3/30. Hey, I may not be so good at this 30 day writing challenge business but I’m still doing it. That counts, right!? Once again, unedited and glorious. Read on, my good fellows.

What stories do you know of your ancestors? What traits do you admire in them. What do you want future generations to to remember about you? What do you want to be known for when you leave this world?

So. To tell you of my history. I could start with specifics but I don’t like specifics. So I won’t be telling you any (that’s a lie, I love specifics). But anyhow, history. I know some of my ancestry. The problem I find is that no-one likes to speak ill of the dead, least of all loved ones and so what we learn of history is shrouded in this utopian version of whatever made these people human. And so, I do not have any specifics (I really like this word today).

But, my ancestors were traders. They journeyed across an ocean and persevered and became wealthy merchants, who did good for the world. They set up some of the first  educational facilities in that part of the world. I love that part. And then there is the part that I’m not so fond of. And my parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles all tell it the same way. These people became arrogant with their wealth and lost their senses. And so all of their wealth was taken from them. And then a murky history of war in the country and terrible living conditions and then my grandparents who gave up their lives and their homes to move to the UK to give their children a better future. And God, how they suffered. I’ve suffered racism but nothing to the extent they did. And knew the meaning of hard work and I feel like my generation have mostly forgotten. Because everything I have in my life came from their sacrifice.

So. History has it’s bad. And we’re humans, so we’ll never learn from it (I live in hope). And then there are the parts which inspire you to be better, to do better, to live better. How do I want future generations to remember me? I can’t give you specifics (drat, the darn word again) but I know I’d like to think that my descendants will think of me in the same vein that I think of my parents and grandparents. I’ve got a long way to go till I become that person. But I want to be known for being someone who made a change in the world, small or big, and never betrayed her principles to make it.

 

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I, I, I Brigade

I am…Me. Simple as that. How do you choose a single word to describe your personality? Every day, every hour, I change. Sometimes I become someone who I don’t recognise and other times, I feel so secure within myself that nothing can hurt me.

But those times are often few and far between. Generally I am drowning in my fears, in the feeling of being adrift and not knowing where I am and how I am. Knowing what I must do to improve myself and yet lacking the zeal to push and push forward to become something meaningful.

Life is full of purpose and yet I am listless. I guess that makes me somewhat of a coward…

Coward (n.) a person who is contemptibly lacking in the courage to do or endure dangerous or unpleasant things.

So, maybe not. I don’t mind unpleasantness or danger, more so that I am stuck within my brain. My life happens there. The downside of being introverted. Maybe. Or maybe I should just leave off this idea that life needs to be rigidly structured to succeed and that will make me better, make me stronger.

You see, I know me. I know who I am. I know the stepping stones in front of me. And I know that I must pull of the best of me and push back against that part of me that is lazy to live in the real world. Descartes said, “I think, therefore I am,” but I am, therefore I think. Thinking only gets you so far. Put into practise what you know and doors that are ajar will swing wide open. That that can be your success.

The images in my mind, my life in my mind become me as a writer. I see colours, vivid and fierce, I hear the winds howl, brush across my face. I taste the rain, lean towards the sun but sway towards the dark. Thoughts go round and round, endlessly circling and never really reaching a conclusion. And you see that within my work, often, as my own peril. What I write is not also as tethered as it should be. You see it in this post.

But me, I am me, and there is no single word to describe my personality. It is ever changing. That’s one thing I can always count on – I’m human.

I feel that in the spirit of full disclosure, I should point out that I did look around at different 30 day writing challenges and have decided to pick and choose what to write about. There’s a part of me that wants to pause already. But onwards and upwards. Let’s get to it.(Also wondering if it is at all clever to start this when I have 2000 words of assignment to complete in five days).
Day 1. Branding: What single word describes your personality? How does it affect you as a writer? Are you whimsical, gregarious or fierce?