An occasional ask of numbness
from the grief that pours through the earth’s veins.
For the leaves are entrenched in the blood of the innocent,
with her eyes hopeless.
And the earth rebels and roars at the injustice.
but justice will come.
Surely justice will come.
With gritted teeth I tear at my chest and dig
bits of bone and flesh flying
only to find the heart empty.
And through tear filled eyes I blink at the remains,
blurred feet and blood pooling.
And so there is nothing to do
but stitch together the remains.
The thread protrudes, scars bold and evasive
but the thread is strong
the mould holding
And so to the sky, tear filled, hazy eyes
I let the air brush my cheek
And mournful howls rustle the leaves
the heart is pounding
And you latch on to the moment
This cavity feels full once again.
A path weaved of many paths,
Borne from the actions of one and the thoughts of another.
Twisting and turning, carving, walls towering, ensnared from every side, keenly observing. Which path? What will be and what will become of me?
Valleys sweeping low through the hillside, paving the way through dense fog, stumbling. Or climbing, over dark and heady air, breathe and breathe again, in and out.
Inhale the the sweetness of the coolness surrounding me. A warm embrace guiding through the unknown, so many paths to the one destination.
I am not convinced of the path ahead. Two steps left, one step right. A puzzle missing pieces, no victory, no conclusion in site.
Yet to stand still with so many opportunities. Only a fool stands still.
Take the first step.
I carry your beauty with me.
A heady burden to bear, knowing what you stand for –
Suppressing my mindlessness, giving me strength to stand
against a world that wishes to mould me. –
I carry your beauty with me, not knowing if I am worthy,
but knowing ultimately, I carry my soul within you.
You epitomize who I wish I could be, your character shines through no matter how you hide,
Like moths to a flame, people are drawn to you, uncomfortable and afraid by what they feel,
not knowing why they feel
and within your beauty, I find a sense of worth
I belong to you, just as you belong to me and I will carry your beauty with me,
Indeed, It would be heavy burden to bear, if your beauty was not with me.
Ah, this silence, perpetuates, this peace.
This soul raises eyes towards that which she cannot see.
Thus silence, perpetuates this peace,
Everliving and Eternal,
I feel Your mercy.
Here you are. Here you are. Did you forget? Did you forget what was meant to be? Or was it a case of not knowing how to be? What is this emptiness that resides within me? Take from me what I have held so lovingly,
Take from me.
It not so easy.
Even if it is meant to be.
I will revel in these moments of solace. This peace is a fragile cloud waiting to disperse the rains.
I find you. In chaos, I find you. Waiting for me to come back to you. No matter where I turn, you breathe life into me.
I turn from you over and over. Yet you are a saving grace. And I turn, even though I feel my heart harden. My soul weeps. The taste of bitter regret.
I turn to you. And you are there. Watchful. Waiting.
With you, I find home.